Yet another journey, day one....

and for once I'm not focused on how long this will take, because I'm jonesin' for some relief so my focus is on not being in pain, and not about losing weight.  Today as promised, I stuck to a smaller plate, and my portions were very small didn't even take up have the plate and THEN I let my self have more.  I had about 1/2 worth of scrambled eggs and later finished what was left, realistically about another 1 1/2 eggs worth.  Not so bad - two eggs.  Threw some onions on them and a small, small bit of shredded cheddar.  Probably didn't need to eat the bacon (ate about 5 slices) but I did deliberately NOT eat any tortillas.  Had about a 4 oz. OJ and have had 40 oz. of water today and of course a cup of coffee.  Not going to report my food intake all day/every day, but that's my start.  We ate at least three hours ago and I am nowhere near hungry yet.  I will however, have a tiny bit of fruit to keep the fire stoked.

My knee was burning all night....did not sleep well, no surprise.  The topical gel that I thought was a miracle drug yesterday a.m. doesn't seem to be helping as much as it was.  I did take an anti-inflammatory this morning though and topped it off later with some ibuprofen.  At least I can walk without feeling like I could collapse any second.  Eager to see how much I can try to drop this week.  Will go to doc for a weigh-in next Saturday just to see what I accomplished.

I keep sayin' I never thought about not being able to walk but honestly I don't know what I expected.  Seems kind of stupid that this problem didn't cross my mind.  And, if I'm really truthful....if I'd known it would come to this, would I really have done things so differently?  I do know for sure that I'm a very extreme person.  I tend to do things all out or not at all.  I guess I shouldn't be so shocked that it would take sometime this dire to finally get my attention to drop weight, not so much to be healthy (which is what I've always professed) and now it's all about dropping weight so I'm not in agony.  Who'da thunk?  Sigh.

Today-water and portion control.
C.

I always knew....

it would come to this.  I've been saying for many years now, perhaps the last four to five, that I knew my knees were thrashed, at 45.  Yuk.  It turns out I was really right.  As I've spent the last week with both knees in such pain, I'm practically ON my knees, and I finally broke down yesterday and went to the doc.  He ordered an xray, done this morning, and by 3 pm today, I had the news, I already knew.  I have severe osteoarthritis in both knees.  Irreversible.  All you can do is treat the symptoms.  Surgery is the last resort.  Good news here, there are plenty of things to try.  Primary cause, other than aging, obesity - surprise (said as dryly as I can manage). 

Don't know my real plan.  Taking an anti-inflammatory and using a topical gel at the moment.  Researching.  Might try acupuncture.  Might ask for some Cymbalta from doc on Monday.  Looking into gastric bypass or lap band surgery.  Polling friends.

Can't even really cry about this, it's all my fault and like I said, I always knew it would come to this or something like this.  I have to admit, the prospect of not being able to walk, wasn't exactly prominent on my radar - I really thought it'd be a near-fatal heart attack (oh all right, who am I kidding, probably a fatal heart attack).

Anyway....I'm hoping to post frequently as things progress.  For anyone that happens to find this, your constructive comments, questions, suggestions and criticisms are welcome.  I think I'm going to need an unusually large and varied cheer leading squad.

One bite, one step at a time, eh?
C.